How To Become More Intentional

Motherhood and parenting in general is such a turbulent time! 

Since having my baby last year, I found myself feeling a little scattered.  Swinging between extremely grateful, elated and blissed out as we basked in our little miracle  to  overwhelming bouts of anxiety, depression, agitation and overstimulation...

I became so focused on what may or may not happen in the future that I wasn't really present in the moment and I would miss so many little moments with my little one as a result.

The guilt that would follow as a result of that would be all consuming and the cycle would then begin again.

I dont know about you love, but I experienced and sometimes continue to experience so many conflicting emotions every single day as a parent, that the first few months with my newborn I didn't really pay too much attention to what those emotions were trying to tell me. I just tried my best to get through each moment as best I could, whether it was negative or positive.

Yet overtime I noticed that something wasn't right, I was aware that my life had gone through a gigantic transition...We had another small human to protect, provide and care for, I was healing from a major surgery alongside a chronic illness and the general daily responsibilities that come with that.

But I felt disconnected from the world around me, my moods were low much more often than they were happy and I didn't understand what type of thoughts were racing around my mind, what feelings I was unconsciously entertaining or how those thoughts and feelings were influencing how I interacted with myself, my family and my day to day activities.

Until  I chose to become truly aware of my thoughts and feelings.

I was shocked!

I've spent over a decade working on my mental health and emotional wellbeing...How to honor my thoughts and feelings, how to be aware and mindful.

I really thought I had it down!

Yet when I reapplied those practices that I was so familiar with...I was SHOCKED!

There were so many negative narratives running the show behind the scenes...Stories, Ideas and beliefs...no wonder I was feeling so low!

So this year, I am working on bringing awareness and intention into everything I do.

Whether it's brushing my teeth, cleaning, playing with my children, walking in nature  or taking time out to create something, whatever that something might be!

We spend so much time in UNAWARENESS  that we miss opportunities to learn about ourselves and the world around us! 

A great way to counteract UNAWARENESS is to utilize MINDFULNESS.

There's this myth that mindfulness is used to completely silence the thoughts that whizz around our minds. This is not exactly true..you see, we have thousands upon thousands of thoughts running around in our heads every minute... So It’s physically impossible to catch and silence them all.

What mindfulness can do for us however, is change our relationship to our thoughts by teaching us how to become :

• Aware
• Present
• Compassionate
• Less Judgemental of ourselves and others

Basically helping you to become an objective observer of your thoughts and detaching any feelings of judgement that might surface as a result of thinking them.

It’s quite common to judge ourselves for feeling or thinking certain things, especially when we don’t realize that were doing it. We tend to push those thoughts aside and refuse to truly acknowledge them because of how they might make us feel, about ourselves, others and the world around us.

 Our inner critics can be quite intimidating. Yet when we learn to utilize mindfulness  properly, it can be a very helpful tool in our personal growth.

Over time when mindfulness tools are consistently applied  we learn to recognize that we are not our thoughts. We learn how to to detach from judgement we once associated with them and begin to recognize what our mind is actually trying to reveal to us with a clear perspective.

The filter is removed to reveal the truth of what we are feeling and why we are feeling it.

This will help provide us create opportunities to pause, observe, and then respond with the appropriate action from a space of understanding, self compassion and presence, instead of falling into a cycle of emotional reactions that keep us stuck in the same place.

We will know what we can change around us to help create a more loving and understanding internal and external environment. 

We become more intentional in what we do and do not do, Which means we make better choices for ourselves.

As a parent to a preteen and a small baby, a wife and a small business owner.. I've found that being more intentional has dramatically improved my mental health, set better boundaries around my time and energy, and also allowed me to start enjoying  parenting in the moment that little bit more!

In honor of the month of love, I'm going to share a few practices over the next few weeks that I use to help move through anxiety, honor my feelings and create a more aligned and present lifestyle for myself and my family.

I hope you find them useful!

Until next time my love

Be safe, Be well and never stop shining bright

Hannah